With Him I Fellowship and Wrestle

The Israelites frequently grumbled against God and Moses in the wilderness. Why? In the wilderness, there was no sowing or reaping-no way to work or survive on their own. It was a place of total dependence on God for every need. So, when their needs went unmet, their only response was to fight against Moses and grumble against God.

But Christians today face no such struggle. We rely on the Babylonian world system for our needs—governments and corporations have taken the place of God in the global order. When problems arise, our complaints are aimed at the institutions we depend on and our superiors. Few grumble against God anymore.

God detests grumbling. The Israelites who grumbled in the wilderness were destroyed by His wrath. Yet, many beloved figures in the Bible—men close to God—also grumbled, complained, and wrestled with Him. But unlike the Israelites, God did not destroy them. Instead, Scripture reveals that He grieved for them. The reason God was angered by the Israelites’ grumbling was their lack of belief; they murmured despite witnessing His great miracles. Their problem was unbelief. But for the godly men I mentioned earlier, their struggle was not unbelief, but disappointment.

They deeply believe in God’s word, but when things unfold contrary to their expectations, they break down in disappointment—lamenting, crying, and grumbling. Is this right? No, it isn’t. It’s a sign of immaturity, a reflection of human weakness, but not a punishable offence. Such tensions are natural when a frail, limited human works alongside an all-knowing, all-powerful God. A smooth journey, free from disappointment and friction, is only possible if you are perfect, like Christ, and walk fully aligned with the Father. Otherwise, the occasional struggle with God is an inevitable part of every believer’s journey

When things didn’t go as he expected, Peter simply raised his net and returned to fishing—because he had another source to rely on. But when things didn’t unfold as they expected, Elijah grew weary and wished for death, while Jeremiah and Jonah argued and wrestled with God. Why? They were hedged in by God, unable to see any other way forward (Job 3:23). Unlike Peter, they had no other source or direction but God alone.

O LORD, You have deceived me and I was deceived; Jeremiah laments, “You are stronger than I, and have prevailed” (Jer 20:7).

There have been countless times in my life when I have grumbled against God. I have trampled the Holy Bible in anger and insulted Him without any respect, even going so far as to call Him a cruel sadist. I fully acknowledge that these are grievous sins. Yet, despite it all, He gave me nothing but His mercy in return. While I pointed my finger in accusation, His arms were outstretched, ready to embrace me.

His only reply was, ‘I know your soul is bound in iron. A time is appointed for you. Wait until then…’ Indeed, it does us no good to cry out to Him, to quarrel, or to grumble. He does not grow angry or chastise us for our complaints, nor does He hasten His appointed blessings because of our cries. In those moments, all He offers us is comfort and warmth. He never reconsiders His eternal decisions concerning us; instead, He lifts us up, encourages us, and helps us rise and run again. There is no Plan B in His divine purpose.

It is not a boast to say that I have never grumbled against God, never turned away from Him, and never fought against Him. To claim ‘I’m not hurt’ could simply mean you’ve never been in the battle field. A husband and wife who live together in the same home will share intimacy and also experience conflicts. It’s ridiculous for the husband in India and wife in England to claim, ‘we’ve never had a fight.